Srila Prabhupada’s Marriage

I was married when I was a student, and I did not

know what will be the... But the parents arranged.

Formerly marriage, at least in India, at least up to our time, the marriage was taking place not on the liking of the boy and the girl. No. It was decided by the parents. So... Just like I was also married man. I was married when I was a student, and I did not know what will be the... But the parents arranged.

[Srimad-Bhagavatam 1.15.46, Lecture, Los Angeles, December 24, 1973]

I was married, my wife was eleven years. I was 22 years.

She did not know what is sex, eleven years' girl.

Syamasundara: Children should be allowed to have sex life at fourteen years old.
Prabhupada: Yes. That is psychological. They develop... Sex life, sex urge is there as soon as twelve years, thirteen years old, especially women. So therefore early marriage was sanctioned in India. Early marriage. Boy fifteen years, sixteen years, and girl twelve years. Not twelve years, ten years. I was married, my wife was eleven years. I was 22 years. She did not know what is sex, eleven years' girl. Because Indian girls, they have no such opportunity of mixing with others. But after the first menstruation, the husband is ready. This is the system, Indian system.
Syamasundara: So they are not spoiled.
Prabhupada: No. And the psychology is the girl, after first menstruation, she enjoys sex life with a boy, she will never forget that boy. Her love for that boy is fixed up for good. This is woman's psychology. And she is allowed to have many, oh, she will never be chaste woman. These are the psychology. So these rascals, Westerners, they do not know and they are becoming philosopher, scientist, and politician, and spoiling the whole world. They can be saved only by this Krsna consciousness movement. There is no other way. Otherwise they will lick up their skyscraper building and everything will go to hell. We have seen in New York, so many houses fall down. In New York. Yes. So many. Simply garbage. I have studied. Simply full of garbage. Nobody is going to take care. And the boys and girls loitering in the street as hippies. This is a very, very, bad sign. You see? No home, home neglected, no regular life. The whole nation will be spoiled. It is already spoiled. The poison is already there. Fire. Now it is increasing. Just like you set fire, it increases. So that fire is already there.

[S.P. Room Conversation, August 15, 1971, London]

So (laughing) an eleven years old girl and I was at the same time twenty-one, twenty-two. One day I captured her hand. She began to cry. A little girl, you see?

When one has heard, when one has properly chanted, he has little experience of the transcendental form of the Lord, then his service beginning. Just like I engage one servant. So gradually he is given service. "First of all this, first of all that, then..." Again and again, again, again. The same example can be given, that the husband and wife. Formerly, when I was married, my wife was eleven years old. So (laughing) an eleven years old girl and I was at the same time twenty-one, twenty-two. One day I captured her hand. She began to cry. A little girl, you see? So gradually, gradually. I know... When my brother-in-law, sister's husband, used to come... In the beginning, the girls were very... My sisters were same age. So they would meet the husband, offering a little pan or little sandesa.

[S.P. Morning Walk, April 12, 1974, Bombay]

I was married when my wife was only eleven

years old. And at the age of fourteen years

she gave birth to first child.

Practically, I'll say, in our childhood age, my sisters were married between nine to twelve years. My eldest sister was married when she was nine years old, before my birth. She is the eldest. And my second sister was married at the age of twelve, twelve years. And my third sister was married at the age of (indistinct) years. So by the (indistinct) years, the marriage must be finished. That was the duty of the father. I remember, because my second sister was going twelve years, my mother said to my father that "I shall go to the river and commit suicide. The daughter is not married." (laughter) You see. The father was very sorry, "Yes, I am trying. What can I do?" (laughter) And then next generation, when my... I was also married man, you know. I was married when my wife was only eleven years old. And at the age of fourteen years she gave birth to first child. And next generation, when my eldest daughter was married at the age of sixteen years--it is little increased--but I was also very much upset that the daughter is sixteen years old.

[Srimad-Bhagavatam Lecture, 1.8.51, Los Angeles, May 13, 1973]

So she came to live at the age of thirteen years,

and at fourteen years she gave birth to a child.

Tamala Krsna: So in such cases they would live separately, though, until they grew older.
Prabhupada: Oh, yes. Until the girl is twelve, fourteen. She must be pub..., be puberty period. Then...
Tamala Krsna: But still, they know who they are married to.
Prabhupada: Oh, yes.
Tamala Krsna: So they don't have any anxiety.
Prabhupada: Yes. (break) ...age was at that time eleven years. So she came to live at the age of thirteen years, and at fourteen years she gave birth to a child.
Hrdayananda: How old were you, Prabhupada, when you...
Prabhupada: Eh?
Hrdayananda: How old were you when you got married?
Prabhupada: I was student, so we were living separately. When she was thirteen years old, after puberty, then she was at... But there are many mothers still--the difference between the child, first child, and mother, twelve years. There are many mothers. At twelve years they gave birth to a child, especially in Bengal.
Tamala Krsna: In America that is considered very horrible.
Hrdayananda: Why?
Tamala Krsna: Catastrophe.
Prabhupada: All my sisters were married within twelve years. My second sister, she became twelve years, and I heard my mother become so disturbed: "Oh, this girl is not being married. I shall commit suicide." (laughter)
Tamala Krsna: At twelve!
Prabhupada: Twelve years. And she was given to a boy, my brother-in-law, for the second marriage. Means that my brother-in-law lost his first wife, and still, he was twenty-one years old. My sister was twelve years old and brother-in-law was twenty-one. In the sastra... I do not know exactly what is that sastra, but they say that if the girl before marriage has menstruation, then the father has to eat that menstrual liquid. Means it is, mean, very strict. And if the father is not living, then the elder brother has to eat. (break) ...ty of getting the girl married rests on the father. In the absence of the father, the eldest brother. The girl must be married. That is it. It is called daya, kanya-daya.

[S.P. Morning Walk, February 9, 1976, Mayapura]

"My dear boy, you are trying to marry again. I request

you don't do that. You do not like your wife. That

is a great fortune for you." (laughter)

So I think I have spoken about my own life. You know that I was a married man. So after being married, I did not like my wife. (laughter) Somehow or other, I did not like. I must say she is very faithful, very everything... Everyone praised. But I did not like, somehow or other. So I was preparing for next marriage. Next marriage. Because in India, at that time it was allowed, a man can marry more than one wife. Now the law is there. So my father, he was a saintly person. So he called me one day and said, "My dear boy, you are trying to marry again. I request you don't do that. You do not like your wife. That is a great fortune for you." (laughter) So I gave up that idea of marrying. Yes. So now I am realizing my father's blessing, yes, that if I would have been too much attached to my wife, then I could not have come to this position. That's a fact. So by ethical point of view, from spiritual point of view, to become too much attached to wife is an impediment for spiritual advancement.

[Srimad-Bhagavatam Lecture, 1.3.17, Los Angeles, September 22, 1972]

I was never attached to my wife or home which resulted

in my complete liberation from worldly attachment

and devote myself fully in Krishna Consciousness.

I think that your separation from Karunamayi is Krishna's desire. So don't be sorry for it. In this connection I may tell you my personal life experience. When I was married at the age of 21 with a wife who was only 11 years old, practically I did not like my wife. And as I was at that time very young man, and an educated college student, I wanted to marry again, in spite of my wife being present. Because amongst the Hindus one can accept more than one wife (of course the law is now changed). So, whenever everything was all ready for my marriage with another girl, my great father who was a great devotee of the Lord, called me and instructed me in the following words:
"My dear boy, I understand that you are trying to get yourself married again, but I would advise you not to do this. It is Krishna's Grace that your present wife is not just according to your liking. This will help you not to become attached with wife and home, and this will help you in the matter of your future advancement of Krishna Consciousness."
Now, I accepted my father's advice, and by his blessings, only, I was never attached to my wife or home which resulted in my complete liberation from worldly attachment and devote myself fully in Krishna Consciousness. Therefore I think your separation from Karunamayi is also the same opportunity for your being cent per cent engaged in Krishna Consciousness.

[S.P. Letter to: Gargamuni, Allston, Mass, 5 May, 1968]

As young man, say, twenty-two, twenty-three. In Jagannatha Puri I used to take bath in the sea.

At that time I had energy to take bath.

Prabhupada: (break) ...as young man, say, twenty-two, twenty-three. In Jagannatha Puri I used to take bath in the sea. At that time I had energy to take bath.
Gurukrpa: Jagannatha Puri is nice sea.
Prabhupada: Yes.
Gurukrpa: Called maha-tirtha.
Prabhupada: After that, I don't remember I ever took bath in the sea.
Gurukrpa: The water is very warm here.
Bali-mardana: You were taking bath in Yamuna.
Prabhupada: Yes, that I was regularly, when I was in Vrndavana. In childhood I was going with my father to take bathing in the Ganges, Calcutta. That I was going regularly.

[S.P. Morning Walk, May 28, 1975, Honolulu]

So he offered me a lunch, and I saw there was

something, a small ball-like, in the pot, bowl. So

I asked, "What is this?" He said, "It is meat." (laughs)

Prabhupada: And these ingredients are supplied by Jagannatha's own field. They grow it, and they... So there is no difficulty. They grow and they sell. They get money so they can maintain the establishment. A long time. There are potters. Daily they will supply for each prasadam a new pot. It cannot be used again. So few people purchase with pot, original pot, and they have got a fixed price. This big pot, say, five rupees; this pot, two rupees; this pot, one rupee. So as you like, you can purchase. Very nice system.
Tamala Krsna: You went there sometimes to take prasadam?
Prabhupada: Yes, I became a guest. A gentleman was our tenant, and he gave me introduction letter to his brother-in-law. He was a pleader in Jagannatha Puri. So he received me very well. So he offered me a lunch, and I saw there was something, a small ball-like, in the pot, bowl. So I asked, "What is this?" He said, "It is meat." (laughs) He was eating meat, so he thought it is good reception, the guest is offered nice meat. So I said, "No, you... I never took meat. I never expected..." (break) Then "Never mind." Then I stopped eating there. At that time I was a boy. After appearing in my B.A. examination there was holiday, so I went to Jagannatha Puri in 1920 or something like that. So I was married in 1918. So some of the friends of my wife, they said that "Your husband now gone. He is not coming back." So after returning I understood she was crying. (laughs) So anyway, then I used to purchase prasadam in the market. They were bringing, and I was eating. I stayed for three, four days. That's all.

[S.P. Room Conversation, January 19, 1976, Mayapur]

I was jumping here. (laughter) 1920 or '21, I came.

After my appearing in examination, B.A. test, I came here..... Because jubilant, I was jumping. When the

waves come, I was jumping, the waves passed.

Prabhupada: ...I was jumping here. (laughter) 1920 or '21, I came. After my appearing in examination, B.A. test, I came here. By that time I was married. I was married in 1918. (break) Because jubilant, I was jumping. When the waves come, I was jumping, the waves passed. There was one guide, he taught me, Babuji, ei sakava.(?)
Gargamuni: They wear those hats.
Prabhupada: Yes. (break) ...'20, and it is 1977. How many years?
Gurukrpa: Fifty-seven years.
Prabhupada: Fifty-seven years after. (laughs) So the body has not changed? Where is that body? Now I am with stick. (laughter) Then I was jumping. Is not that? I am there. I remember. The body has changed. What is the difficulty to understand? I am the same person. How I am remembering all these things. But I have no... That body is now lost. Tatha dehantara-praptih. Why this simple philosophy these rascals cannot understand? I remember I am not the second man. I am the same person but I haven't got the same body. The whole world this simple philosophy cannot understand. Where is the difficulty? I cannot understand.

[S.P. Morning Walk, January 25, 1977, Puri]

I was student, 1900 up to '20. Then I joined Gandhi's

noncooperation movement and gave up my education.

Prabhupada: Oh, you are just like my child. My first child was born 1921. What is your birth date?
Ambassador: That was three years earlier. So there you are.
Prabhupada: 1918? In that year I was married. I was student at that time. I was student, 1900 up to '20. Then I joined Gandhi's noncooperation movement and gave up my education. His points were to give up English education, English court, English-manufactured goods, in this way.
Ambassador: How did you feel about Gandhiji spiritually?
Prabhupada: He was a good gentleman, that's all. He had no spiritual asset.

[S.P. Room Conversation, March 13, 1975, Iran]

ORDERING INFORMATION

Srila Prabhupada Lilamrta As It Is, is softbound, with full colour cover (inside and out). It has 400 pages of Srila Prabhupada quotes with some black and white pictures and 16 full colour plates. If you would like to order a copy please contact Mukunda dasa at : prabhupada_sankirtana_society@yahoo.co.uk